unconditional charity?

In this cold winter evening, I parked my car in the lot of Hollywood Video in the Central District and hurried to the entrance. I was looking forward to watching March of the Penguin, but a man near the door asked me if I had any change.

Without much deliberation, I said, “I don’t have any, but I can buy you some food.” (I have a policy of not giving money to any stranger since I’m not sure how they will spend it.)

The man enthusiastically agreed. I told my friend to find the movie while I accompanied the man to the nearest eatery. He was black and wearing heavy clothes on this chilly night. A beanie covered his head and a beard covered his face. The white hairs suggested his age was in the 40’s or 50’s.

We made small talk as we crossed the street to Taco Del Mar. I ask if he lived around this area. He says that he grew up here and tells me he once worked at Microsoft as a software tester. The man speaks intelligently enough.
He tells me that he is starving. As we come up to Taco Del Mar, it had just closed. I suggest that we go to the Subway a few yards away. It is also closed. We journey to the Red Apple Grocery store to escape the cold.

I continue to ask him questions.

“Do you have any kids?”, I ask.
“Yea, I have kids.” says the man. He doesn’t extrapolate. He is focused on reaching the food department of the grocery store.

I question, “Where are you staying?”.
“I’m staying at a friends place right now,” he answers.

He picks up a packed cold meal and ruby red juice. We navigate to the checkout and the man greets the cashier, Cliff, as if he knows him. I start to get suspicious. As I finish paying for the purchase, the man darts back to the food department to heat the meal without waiting for me.

Cliff asks, “Did he do something for you?”
Somewhat puzzled, “No, he said he’s hungry and I’m buying him some food.” I replied.

“He’s always around here, he’s trouble. Did he tell you he was a software tester? Yea, he tells that to everybody. But its a good gesture, what you’re doing you know.” Cliff finishes. “A really good gesture.”

I don’t say anything and just nod. I’m somewhat numb now. Not surprised really. I have been taken advantage of many times, I just expect it now.

I slowly walk back towards the food department. I just wanna say bye and go. I say goodbye to the man and tell him God bless you. I turn around and walk away. Frankly, I don’t even remember if he said thank you.

I’m not much bitter or less giving because of these situations. More sad really. I couldn’t care less about the $5 or so. Its charity and Jesus says give to the poor. [insert obligatory scripture here]. I will continue to naively buy food for people I meet on the street in the hopes of God restoring them. If love is suppose to be unconditional, then so must my charity. Or at least give the benefit of the doubt. I obey and the Lord judges.

I hope the man sleeps well tonight.

By the way, his name is Darrell. Look out for Darrell in the Central District.