back to blogging

So I guess I’m going to try and blog again.  Most of the posts are from circa early 2006.  I lost most of my old posts due to fact I accidentally deleted my blogger account.  Blah!

Time to brush up on my writing again.

runner’s song

runner’s song

in the beginning
all others have pass me
leaving me
chasing those in front of me

my rhythm increases as my heart paces
each step becomes one beat
like a percussion so stress free
drumming a pounding on the concrete

one hill before me
a moment breath of exhaustion
little did i know this hill had no ending
this elevation takes away all my elation

my light beats begin to turn dark
a stiff melody plays in my body
intercession is required
but the conductor is unrelenting

the audience is chanting along each measure
in the distance
i hear the climax approaching
a crescendo of applause awaits

crashing through the line
the music stops
a chorus erupts
breathe, breathe, breathe

snowshoeing

I took up snowshoeing this past weekend at Snoqualmie.  Snowshoeing sounds so much fun and fluffy, but I found out its basically hiking in the snow.  Duh right?  Anyways, it totally kicked my ass into level 9 soreness and I’m still recovering.  These pictures will show why I’m not a wimp.

Here’s the gang happily snowshoeing.  Unbeknownst to them is that the trail ends up at the top of the mountain on the upper right side depicted in this picture.  No, I’m not kidding.

More happy pictures of enjoying the scenery.  Truly beautiful.

More postcard views.

Here we are at the upper right ridge from the first picture. This picture doesn’t show the 60 degree slope, but I had to use my hands to climb up.  There was a couple times where I slipped and almost rolled down the hill into a giant snowball.  In this picture, I’m thinking that the snowball death would be a terrible way to go.  Kelly (in red coat) was encouraging me by hymning the theme to Rocky.

Made it to the top and this is the view from the ridge.  Wonder why the lake is named Snowlake?  I have no clue.

Some peeps from Quest church and their friends.  Right now my face is frozen and can’t take off my sunglasses if I wanted to.  There was about 10 minutes of silence while we ate due to hunger and the stuffing of face.

The beginning of the trail is wedged in the valley far in the distance.  Rolling down as a snowball sounds appealing to me.  But I remember that I would probably die if I choose the quicker path.

Wisdom prevails, I compromise by sliding down the steep hill on my butt until I got a wedgie.

Here’s Source Lake covered in the snow.  I have nothing witty to say.

God’s magnificent creation.  We are not worthy.

While on the hike, I kept thinking how terrible this feels and that I could die from snowshoeing.  But after it was all and done, it was fun and I had a great sense of accomplishment.  Next week, Mount Everest.

christian sub-standard culture

The last couple weeks, I have been pondering the cultural insulation that Christians have built in America. In my teenage years, I grew up hanging around with non-churchgoers or secular people, as Christians like to call them. As my spirituality grew with Christ, my time spent around non-churchgoers grew nonexistent. My inability to fully comprehend the Gospel and the dominant church sub-culture present today shielded me from interacting with the “secular” world and its people. Somehow the mathematical transitive property was applicable to real life. If I interacted with secular people in the sinful world, I was interacting with sin.

The Christian sub-culture is the less creative sanitized imitation of popular culture. Merchandise is uniquely labeled or inferred as Christian by means of stamping on the name of Jesus or scripture. Everything is repackaged to make it more acceptable to consume, from music to clothing. This is not to dismiss the talent nor usefulness of such things, but it demonstrates the cultural divide Christians create. Not only in consumptive materials, it is also prevalent in social relationships and interactions.

Christian sub-culture divide does not exist in its merchandise nor image, it exists in our personal engagement with the world. Christian merchandise is the palpable material extension of our desire to subdue and censor the world around us. To eliminate tension and produce a safe house for believers to be emancipated from the reality of sin. The sub-culture that is ostensibly protective and encouraging ultimately becomes a hindrance and obstacle in faith.

The cultural vacuum disconnects believers and non-believers. Communication is intermittent and defensive. The people God wants to reach are the same people excluded. When a boy grows up in the sub-culture and then loses his faith in college, the blame is on the popular culture and not on the Pharisaic rules of the sub-culture his faith was based on. Christians cannot change the world until they engage it. The cultural bubble must burst to fully adhere to the command of “love thy neighbor”, including myself.

pedro the lion

It’s Hard to Find a Friend

Rainy day and melancholy moods ending in hope.

Secret Of The Easy Yoke

i could hear the church bells ringing
they pealed aloud your praise
the members faces were smiling
with their hands out stretched to shake
it’s true they did not move me
my heart was hard and tired
their perfect fire annoyed me
i could not find you anywhere

could someone please tell me the story
of sinners ransomed from the fall
i still have never seen you
and some days i don’t love you at all

the devoted were wearing bracelets
to remind them why they came
some concrete motivation
when the abstract could not do the same
but if all that’s left is duty
i’m falling on my sword
at least then i would not serve
an unseen distant lord

if this is ony a test
i hope that i’m passing
cause i’m losing steam
and i still want to trust you

peace be still

unconditional charity?

In this cold winter evening, I parked my car in the lot of Hollywood Video in the Central District and hurried to the entrance. I was looking forward to watching March of the Penguin, but a man near the door asked me if I had any change.

Without much deliberation, I said, “I don’t have any, but I can buy you some food.” (I have a policy of not giving money to any stranger since I’m not sure how they will spend it.)

The man enthusiastically agreed. I told my friend to find the movie while I accompanied the man to the nearest eatery. He was black and wearing heavy clothes on this chilly night. A beanie covered his head and a beard covered his face. The white hairs suggested his age was in the 40′s or 50′s.

We made small talk as we crossed the street to Taco Del Mar. I ask if he lived around this area. He says that he grew up here and tells me he once worked at Microsoft as a software tester. The man speaks intelligently enough.
He tells me that he is starving. As we come up to Taco Del Mar, it had just closed. I suggest that we go to the Subway a few yards away. It is also closed. We journey to the Red Apple Grocery store to escape the cold.

I continue to ask him questions.

“Do you have any kids?”, I ask.
“Yea, I have kids.” says the man. He doesn’t extrapolate. He is focused on reaching the food department of the grocery store.

I question, “Where are you staying?”.
“I’m staying at a friends place right now,” he answers.

He picks up a packed cold meal and ruby red juice. We navigate to the checkout and the man greets the cashier, Cliff, as if he knows him. I start to get suspicious. As I finish paying for the purchase, the man darts back to the food department to heat the meal without waiting for me.

Cliff asks, “Did he do something for you?”
Somewhat puzzled, “No, he said he’s hungry and I’m buying him some food.” I replied.

“He’s always around here, he’s trouble. Did he tell you he was a software tester? Yea, he tells that to everybody. But its a good gesture, what you’re doing you know.” Cliff finishes. “A really good gesture.”

I don’t say anything and just nod. I’m somewhat numb now. Not surprised really. I have been taken advantage of many times, I just expect it now.

I slowly walk back towards the food department. I just wanna say bye and go. I say goodbye to the man and tell him God bless you. I turn around and walk away. Frankly, I don’t even remember if he said thank you.

I’m not much bitter or less giving because of these situations. More sad really. I couldn’t care less about the $5 or so. Its charity and Jesus says give to the poor. [insert obligatory scripture here]. I will continue to naively buy food for people I meet on the street in the hopes of God restoring them. If love is suppose to be unconditional, then so must my charity. Or at least give the benefit of the doubt. I obey and the Lord judges.

I hope the man sleeps well tonight.

By the way, his name is Darrell. Look out for Darrell in the Central District.

welcome to the kingdom

I think its always interesting to hear how people outside the church culture perceive Christians and their actions. Being in the midst of a narrow group or agenda tends to promote homogeneous opinions and behaviors which can fog one’s own hypocrisy or thwart one’s critical thinking ability. I often find myself being seduced to polarization by the secular and non-secular moral division perpetuated through the christian media.

Offsetting sweeping generalizations and popular conclusions have been common for me the past year through dialogue with people who are different from me, people who don’t share my faith and people who come from unique backgrounds.

While I was taking classes at Regent, Gordon Fee said something about American churches that made me think. He said that the majority of churches in the US are the results of uniformity and not true unity. This begs the question, what is true unity? Is it indisputable codified creeds and standards that we all agree upon? I think that is how we define it now which is why there exists more uniformity than unity in the absence of alternative and varied voices within the church. Appreciation for ethnic diversity and cultural pluralism is a catalyst to modern unity. This sounds post-modern and nebulous in structure, but it takes a pinch of humility and a double dose of listening to fully embrace God’s diverse kingdom.